No puppies were killed in the making of this blog

So there's been a cartoon making the rounds on Facebook for quite awhile now, that people have been posting on my wall and emailing to me many times a week for what feels like eons. And in case you didn't know, an eon is the longest division of geologic time containing two or more eras. And I'm no expert on eras or any other time-related things, but I'm pretty sure that it's a really long-ass time. And actually, if I were a professor in whatever the hell it was in which they discussed eons and geological crap like that, I'd tell my students to just call it a really long-ass time instead of eon. I would want my class to be all casual and friendly and I would wear cardigans with elbow patches and I'd climb on desks and recite poetry and perform musical numbers to inspire them. And I'd also probably forget to go to class a lot and then get fired and then they'd have some sort of poetic musical situation to raise awareness on my firing and get me re-hired.

But as usual I'm way off point.

The point is supposed to be the cartoon that I adore that was given to me a bazillion and 3 times:

Now you know why so many people sent me this. If you know me at all then you know that it is THE PERFECT cartoon for me. It could only be more perfecter if the unicorn was wearing a beer can helmet full of Modelo. 

I've loved that cartoon long time, but never knew who drew it until a friend of mine (Thanks, Brent) sent me a link to this dude named Sebastien Millon's website because he thought it would be something that I would like. Well, strangely enough, it happened to be the site for the artist of this very cartoon that I adored. I nearly died as I went through all of his work. Yes, all. And there's a whole lot too. And I loved each picture more than the last. And I quickly realized something: I totally and completely understand this person's brain. The more cartoons I looked at the more I realized that this dude was somehow hooked into my brain. His artwork is super cute and perky. His characters are adorable. And on first glance you might think "Awe....that is so cute and sweet!" and then you look closer, and you read the caption, and you're like "Holy balls! WTF did I just read?" 

And that's kinda what I feel like sometimes. Sweet and normal on the outside but all kinds of WTF on the inside.

Here are a few of my many favorites:

I immediately felt a kinship with Sebastien, so I decided to send him an email. 

After sending the email I realized that since he is way more awesome than me, he probably gets waaaayyyy more email than me. And I get a lot. So I decided to write to him again and in the subject line I put "If you don't read this, puppies will die!" Since he draws lots of animals I figured that even though some of the animals in his drawings are murderers and murderees, he was still probably an animal lover and would not want to kill real-life non-cartoony puppies. Well, it worked. He could have easily been branded a puppy killer, but he saved himself by writing me back pretty quickly, and I like to think that we bonded. I mean, it's totally possible that if you asked him he may perhaps refer to it as more of a "She stalked me and I only wrote her back because I thought she might actually kill some freaking puppies and blame it on me," kinda situation. But I prefer to think it's the whole bonding thing. So we went back and forth a bit and yada yada yada, he drew this new blog banner for me that even includes little fat baby ducks with jet packs (cuz you guys know how bad I want a jet pack), and a squirrel (cuz you know my history with squirrels), and his trademark Unicorns and Bunny, and I designed a whole new blog around it. Well, I mentally designed it but hired a creative guy named Bill to actually take the stuff from my head and put it on the screen, because I am barely computer literate enough to run this blog, let alone make a whole website blog thingamajiggy.

Sebastien's drawings make me happy. They are what my Pattitopia looks like in my head: colorful, fun, perky, sweet, weird, with an underlying and sometimes blatantly overlying dose of freaky. One minute things are nice and calm, and the next minute they might go horribly awry. Like his cartoons, I think that people will be all "Oh my! This blog looks like an 8-year-old girl threw up all over it! It's adorable!" Then they'll start to read a few blog posts and be all "This woman makes me giggle AND kinda scares the poop outta me at the same time. I am so confused!" And this confusion is something that I kinda like.

I hope you guys like it too. If you don't you'd be wise to protect your teeth, because Bunny is going to kick them in. 

A HUGE thank you to Sebastien Millon for being so wonderfully gracious and lovely. AND for saving the puppies, AND for responding to my email. AND for making me this amazingly perky banner. He couldn't be any nicer. Please go see his work on his website and like his page on Facebook (links below). And thank you to Bill Downey for making the rest of the page fit in with the banner. I know you wanna kill me now because of how bossy I am, but please don't, or you'll get your teeth kicked in by Bunny too. That Bunny. He's a badass.

Sebastien's Etsy Shop
Sebastien's Website

Sebastien's Facebook Page